Family Secrets - Guilty Breath by Pyrox666xPheebs, literature
Literature
Family Secrets - Guilty Breath
As people leave he knows he can only trust in that which does not breathe
He is still just a child in their eyes
Unable to see the truth behind their smiles
Yet it is them who are blind
For he knows more of the world than they.
Reality is not obscured to his innocent eyes
Holding a heart open to the emotions
Suffocating the purity within him
The chair where his mother once sat
The mask his father once wore
The hidden
Like always you push it from your mind.
Turn yourself blind to the pictures
Deaf to the words
Dead to the feelings
If you can make it like it never happened
The pain of it all cant tear you up inside
And you dont have to spend another night
Reliving the torture they say shouldnt happen
They say if you accept it
Learn from it
It wont happen again
And again
And again
But with every dream
Every touch
Every thought
You relive it
Until you dont care anymore
Until its the only way you feel
Through the pain
Until each glance across a room
Is another drop of blood seeping f
Like always you push it from your mind.
Turn yourself blind to the pictures
Deaf to the words
Dead to the feelings
If you can make it like it never happened
The pain of it all cant tear you up inside
And you dont have to spend another night
Reliving the torture they say shouldnt happen
They say if you accept it
Learn from it
It wont happen again
And again
And again
But with every dream
Every touch
Every thought
You relive it
Until you dont care anymore
Until its the only way you feel
Through the pain
Until each glance across a room
Is another drop of blood seeping f
I had stayed home from school that day.
Suffering with the torturous symptoms of flu, I was huddled in a blanket on the sofa.
He often came over to our house straight from work; still in his beige boots with dirt on his hands. But today it was 2 oclock, he wasn't supposed to be finished yet and he had no right coming to my house anyway.
Charming as ever, he knelt down beside me and handed me some chewy sweets. Grateful as I was, I wouldn't let him know it, giving him my usual sarcastic thanks in reply. Reaching over to place them on the table, I shuffled back in my seat uncomfortably, noticing him staring at me.
He seemed to enjoy m
Let's just sit in silence.
Cradle me in your arms.
I need not your questions,
or your words of cheer.
Just hold me.
In the silence.
I want to feel your love
While releasing my senses
So i can just be.
I just need a moment
Where I don't need to stand.
I don't need to smile
I don't need to speak.
I need a moment where I'm safe.
A is for Anorexia
The love of my life
B is for Bulimia
Hurts more than a knife
C is for Cutting
To punish my soul
D is for Depression
Who is digging my hole
E if for ED-NOS
Diseased and Alone
F is for Friends
Understanding your groan
G is for Ghosts
Haunting you always
H is for Happiness
Havent experience for days
I is for Isolated
No matter whos there
J is for Jelly
Under skin, they stare
K is for Killing
Yourself dont you see
L is for Liar
You didnt mean to be
M is for Monsters
Hiding under your bed
N is for Neurotic
The thoughts in your head
O is for Over
You feel you are through
P is f
Close your eyes
Open Pandoras Box in your mind;
The one that holds all your darkest secrets
Allow the evil to escape and swarm inside;
Like a hive of bees hungry for blood.
Do not speak
Do not move
Let the faces and the actions consume you
Blurred visions become clearer
Faded emotions become sharper
Allow the tears to stream down your face;
Like a waterfall cooling the burn in your cheeks
Feel the pain
The terror
The disgust
Shattering your heart into a million pieces;
Just like a mirror;
Piercing every inch of your cell
Do not stop these m
Ignorance is Bliss? by Pyrox666xPheebs, literature
Literature
Ignorance is Bliss?
She squeezed her eyes shut
Tighter and tighter
Not one drop of weakness could escape
From her worn puzzled eyes
Her thoughts scrambled
Twisted and turned
They attacked her mind
And demolished her heart
Leaving her body broken on the floor
Cuddled into a tiny heap
Constraining the pain
Maybe... just maybe
She could hold it captive long enough
That it will disappear.
Maybe just maybe
She could squeeze it out of her pores
And watch it evaporate into the air.
Maybe... just maybe
Not.
Talking hadnt helped.
Uttered words were just lies from a manipulative heart.
Nothing was pure
Slander from the devil
To prot
Acceptance
11-12-08
He loves me,
He loves me not
But that is not the most important question
When speaking about a relationship.
He trusts me,
He trusts me not
Now we get closer to the truth,
But we are still not there yet.
He accepts me,
He accepts me not
Thats the one!
For trust and love follow acceptance.
So, does he accept you for who you are?
Thawed Heart
20-12-08
For The One I Love
I put up a wall of ice around my heart;
Stalactites and stalagmites so sharp a guard
That no other signpost was needed.
I deemed myself unworthy of love:
Nobody was getting close to my heart.
Imprisoned within its cold chamber of frosted brokenness,
It could only beat slowly a sluggish
Reminder of its existence within its frozen jail untouchable
And unreachable.
Then you came.
You, a shining knight brandishing love in one hand
And acceptance in the other:
Arms open in a battle-stance unfamiliar to one used to rejection.
Your eyes saw past the ice to the heart that labored
Playdough
28-10-08
(Playdough idea taken from a Louie Giglio DVD)
Pink playdough; rosebud pink.
Representing the cliché and cutesy love...
Or maybe just meaning lovable?
Used for sweet things candyfloss
And lollypops
Childrens stuffed toys.
Pink playdough people would love children,
Work with them or for them.
They would be lovable humans,
Or those weird people who inexplicably love others unconditionally.
Pink streaks pop up in other playdough people when the love shines through,
Or when you see people melt at children.
Green; that Im fake grass green.
Representing the cli
Current Residence: Arkham Asylum Favourite genre of music: Rock/ Pirate Metal MP3 player of choice: Ipod Nano - My Glen(da)! Favourite cartoon character: Lilo & Stitch Personal Quote: "Love All, Trust a Few"
Hello fellow stragglers who still venture onto this page!
I bid the welcome from long lost writings and a promise of new stirrings in the light of ~SapphicAlure (https://www.deviantart.com/sapphicalure)
Haha =P okay, enough of the funny talk.
I created a new account for many reasons.
1#. Though i do not have the time to write much these days i have churned up a few things
2#. I don't really feel like they belong on this account. I have grown and thus my writing has too and i feel that from now on it'll be good to start afresh.
3#. it'll clear up some watchers and deviations etc.
This account will remain open, as i've had so much support through here and so many people hav
First off, sorry for those who have messaged/noted me and are worried... with college and everything i'm usually too tired etc to come on.. so MAJOR apologizes.
So news on the for front...
I think i'm *brace yourself*... HAPPY. :D
Now don't get me wrong nothing is perfect but i do think that i am actually happy.
:work:College:work:
I am still in college and LOVING it. I have many friends there and it's just... AWESOME! The work is just so much fun and challenging in some places!
I've actually done one half of my Maths GCSE exam and i think i done well. it was only foundation paper because they don't do higher.. but it's still a GCSE!
Alot of things have happened since my last journal.. July 22nd.
First off.. Mark has a birthday.
I went to England for a week with my Father and Nan.
I .. me and mark, completed Lego Star Wars: The Original Trilogy.
I started college.
I'm doing Maths, English and Science GCSE's, and doing a BTEC in ICT.
It's alot of fun but very tiring. I don't know very many people.
As of two days ago me and mark split up. Semi mutual i suppose.
My dad is away till Tuesday.
I slept over Sarah's last weekend.
For some reason i created an account on facebook.
My hair is now short and im getting it cut even shorter tonight.
I skipped college today.
It's November 15th which means it's that time of the year again and your special day is here! We hope you have an awesome day with lots of birthday fun, gifts, happiness and most definitely, lots of cake! Here's to another year!
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