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~Pyrox666xPheebs

Dame Pheobe Kookerburra
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Journal Entry: Fri Jun 20, 2008, 4:03 PM

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:work: Enter At Own Risk :work:



Why do i watch these fucking movies.
I keep torturing myself and i don't know why.

I didn't even know.... this movie was gonna be like that...
Its fucked up and killing me to watch but i cant stop.

I feel so sick.

I need sleep tonight but i cant
I cant do college,
I cant do a 'normal' life...
I just cant do any of it.

Make it go away.. please


-------


It's now 3:07am.
I watched the movie i downloaded yesterday.
Jack Ketchum's : The Girl Next Door.

I feel so dead inside now..

How can people do these things?

I cried so hard i heard dad stir upstairs, he got out of bed but soon got back in when i stopped my pathetic snivelling.

I deserve this though...
It kills to see... but i deserve it.

I even checked the book out on Amazon.
I want to try and buy it.

I don't get why i do this but i do...
I know i'm only buying the book, because there's a limit to how horrific they could actually make the movie... and believe me... it showed way too fucking much.
But with a book.. every graphic sickening thing, is written in graphic sickening detail.


I really don't want to go to the Open Day tomorrow.
Pretty much all today has just been a failure and its my fault.
I'll never change
And neither will the world.

:relaxed:
Dame Pheobe Kookerburra


:spotlight-left:Features:spotlight-right:


~bluestrawberry ..:gallery:.. ~Malchik1
:heart:

~MutePoetess ..:gallery:.. ~drop-asd
:heart:

22 Comments
  • Mood: Distressed
  • Reading: A Key To Midnight - Dean Koontz
  • Watching: Boys Don't Cry
  • Playing: Kingdom Hearts II - PS2

Devious Comments

love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:icontempestasrex:
~TempestasRex Jun 20, 2008, 4:05:05 PM
I love you pheobe... I will send you a note and try to take your mind off of it!

--
"Ye preachers of equality, the tyrant frenzy of impotence crieth thus in you for "equality": your most secret tyrant longings disguise themselves thus in virtuous words!
:iconshamia:
~shamia Jun 20, 2008, 5:38:34 PM
T-T Please don't act like this... Please... try to be happy... please...

--
If I follow you home...
Would you keep me?
If I lost my way...
Would you lead me back?
If I knew any better...
I would say you loved me...
:iconpyrox666xpheebs:
~Pyrox666xPheebs Jun 20, 2008, 6:06:59 PM
I try.. i just.. it doesnt work

--
:tribute:...The Lotus is a flower that rises from the mud...:tribute:
The deeper the mud, the more beautiful the lotus blooms.
:iconskell-cow:
~skell-cow Jun 20, 2008, 6:55:06 PM
everything changes, everything CAN change, and everything will change .. eventually. this applies to people, you just need to open yourself to it.

--
~Infinity
:iconeds-gurl:
~EDS-GURL Jun 21, 2008, 1:25:28 AM
:hug: It's okay angel... I know I havent been on for awhile, but you can still talk to me when ever. I'm always here for you love :heart:

--
Haylie: You can't get me mad.
Ai: Fine, you're as short as our eight year old daughter.
Haylie: *glare* screw you. You're not getting any for a month *walks off*
Ai: D: that's just unfair! *runs aftr her*
:iconfrizziekizzie:
=frizziekizzie Jun 21, 2008, 2:12:14 AM
Baby - I love you. You can do this, for you in your own time :hug:

--

:jsenn:=RawEm0tion:jsenn:
:tribute:*Self-InjuryClub:tribute:

Avatar by ~Pwincessnaveera
:iconkasabe:
*Kasabe Jun 21, 2008, 4:27:15 AM
You don't know untill you try,we are all behind you and here to help give that push you need to suceed. You can do it kim :)

--
The coroner will find ink in my veins and blood on my computer keys.

The Greatest Mistake In Life Is Continually Fearing You Will Make One

Oh look, He left a little fan boy drool on the wall
:iconmagicaljoey:
~MagicalJoey Jun 21, 2008, 10:21:11 PM
:hug:

--
have you ever just wanted to turn a turtle shell inside out? you know, because why protect the outside from predators when it's the inside that has to deal with memories and the pain?

From "Always, Often" by *Solaces
:iconblindingxlights:
~blindingxlights Jun 22, 2008, 6:17:10 PM
Did you end up going to the college babe? if you did, what did they say?

your journals worry me so much :(

--
what is this thing that builds our dreams, yet slips away from us? who wants to live forever, who dares to love forever?

"the word rhymes with, banker!"
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